3 C’s of Intimacy: Improve Your Loving Relationship Today
Intimacy in a relationship is being close and familiar with someone while having tender, warm, loving, seemingly connected emotions and feeling secure in sharing these feelings with your partner. A good, close and loving relationship is bountiful in something called the 3 C’s of intimacy. You both need strength in the 3 areas of: communication, closeness and commitment. The more these areas grow between you the better your intimacy can become. Improving your intimacy can mean your loving is enhanced too. These 3 key areas can be worked on in therapy and at home. Improved intimacy in a relationship can lead to improved wellbeing for you both and a reduction of stress in the relationship. Who wouldn’t want that? So, let’s get started.
1) Communication: Enhance Your Intimate Talks
Open, honest communication with your partner about what your needs and desires are, are fundamental to a fulfilling intimate relationship for you both. Couples must make the time to listen and tell each other what it is they enjoy doing or what they want to try. This honest, private dialogue can foster a more trusting, more understanding, deeper emotional connection. This offers you both a creative and supportive intimate environment that can enhance pleasure for both of you and can alleviate some of the performance pressures. Talk about intimate desires confidentially and privacy. Afterwards, maybe try something new and exciting you have discussed.
2) Closeness: Makes for Better Intimacy
This is both of you allowing each other to be the real you and to be non-judgmental about your partner as they really are. You should be able to be very comfortable with the other person. Enough for them to drop all their defences and barriers. Be metaphorically naked with them knowing they will accept you for who you are. Bare yourself without judgment from the other of any weaknesses, failings, deficiencies or imperfections. You should be able to be yourself without fear of rejection for any reason to grow your intimacy and closeness.
3) Commitment: is a Key to a Great Intimate Relationship
In the beginning there was always obvious commitment to each other. You were committed to each other for love. A lifelong commitment may have been agreed to in public during a wedding, marriage, partnership ceremony or union. However, after a time this can wane without us even realising this is happening.
To be happily, safely, fulfillingly intimate with someone we need to understand the mutual commitment to each other is there. So, reaffirming this from time to time is good. Make sure you make the time do some intimate things and other things together. When you are making this time for yourselves you should also enjoy each other’s company. Even if your partner does something you don’t find 100% enjoyable, try to go along and enjoy it with them because you are doing it with them.
There is no harm in being honest with them that this is not your first choice of things to do tother but, would like to give it a try. Then, if you have enjoyed it at all, in any way, make sure you tell them that honestly too. If you both make the effort it can be good for your relationship. They might do the same for you too in a good relationship, just ask them along.
References:
McCarthy B (2015) Sex Made Simple: Clinical Strategies for Sexual Issues in Therapy PESI Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Krauss S Ph.D (2023) How to Find Greater Closeness in a Relationship [online]
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/fulfillment-at-any-age/202312/do-you-want-more-closeness-than-you-get-in-your-relationship (last access 06/06/24)